8-31-16 - The Cost

What does it cost you to publicly identify as a Christ-follower? Does it cause a problem with your job? Your family? Your social circle? Do people think you’re foolish? For most Western Christians, the biggest challenge to going deeper as disciples of Jesus is to our time and priorities.

In other parts of the world, though, as each news cycle seems to remind us, being a Christian can cost you your life or your basic relationships. I once read about a Syrian convert to Christianity who was ostracized by his Muslim family for being too “Western,” even suffering a murder attempt by an uncle, and by the Christians he met as being too “Muslim.” Even people in this country can give grave offense to their own families and religious traditions when they convert, or be ridiculed and minimized.

Following Jesus was dangerous for his immediate disciples. Terrorized by the occupying Romans and oppressed by the temple leadership, the average citizen of Jesus’ place and time did well to keep his head low, staying out of trouble. Leaving your livelihood and family to publicly identify with an itinerant teacher who drew a fair amount of attention, much of it suspicious – this was not a recipe for a quiet life. Those who affiliated with Jesus were risking their comfort, work, family relationships – and often their lives. Hence, in his pep talk to would-be disciples, after telling them how radically they need to reorder their priorities if they’re going to follow him, Jesus gives an example:

“For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not first sit down and estimate the cost, to see whether he has enough to complete it? Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it will begin to ridicule him, saying, `This fellow began to build and was not able to finish.'”

Maybe for us, relationship is a better analogy than architecture. What if we translated Jesus’ example: "Who of you, intending to commit to a relationship, does not first sit down and assess feelings, chemistry, compatibility, to see whether there’s enough to engage it? Otherwise, when you’ve told all your friends “This is the one!” and then you break up, all who see it will begin to ridicule you, saying, "They started hot, but sure flickered out in a hurry!"

Fact is, few people I know have a big conversion, start following Christ and keep going. Many of us come on strong, get distracted or disappointed, wander off, wander back, get complacent again, often for years or decades. And at some point we stop wandering away – we start to move closer, into knowing and being known. Our priorities of how we spend our time, money and love shift, open up. We keep choosing, coming closer. Maybe if we’d sat down and counted the cost, we wouldn’t have done it – but now, whatever cost there is, doesn’t seem like a cost at all. More like a gift.

What are the things that pull you away from God-life?
Can you offer those to God and ask the Spirit to help you re-order what counts? 

Do you want to make this relationship more central in your life? What would that look like?

Know that there is a cost, often a hidden one…. and that it is worth more than your life.

8-30-16 - Cross Purposes

This Sunday’s gospel passage begins, "Now large crowds were travelling with him… " I wonder how large the crowds were when Jesus was done talking. Was he trying to cull out the faddiests and thrill-seekers with his talk of “hating” your mother and father, and “carrying your cross?’

“Whoever does not carry the cross and follow me cannot be my disciple.”
Talking about “carrying your cross” to subjects in a Roman colony might just do it – the cross was a terrifying and horrific imperial instrument of execution. I can imagine a few people in that crowd pausing, letting themselves fall back to the margins, and slinking off home.

I might have been one of them. If we interpret “carry the cross” as “embrace your suffering,” as some have done for centuries, I won’t rush forward to sign up. But then, I don’t believe God desires suffering for his beloved, despite passages in the bible that suggest it can be part of God’s plan. I believe God shows up in the midst of the suffering that comes our way; that God’s power and love can redeem and transform it into an opportunity for healing and growth.

So how else might we interpret “carry your cross?” One meaning might be, "Take up your ministry, commit yourself to your part within the whole of God’s mission of restoration and reconciliation." The way each of us is called to participate in God’s mission is a product of our gifts, our passions and our circumstances – and the leading of the Holy Spirit. It is not something we undertake alone. We undertake it with the second half of that imperative, “and follow me.” As we become people of purpose following Christ, using our gifts, filled and guided by the Holy Spirit, we find ourselves more focused and peaceful.

The fullness of Jesus’ ministry involved suffering on the cross. Because he did, we don’t have to. We may be asked to sacrifice some of our resources, our prerogatives, our agenda; we might even encounter resistance and suffering, but not because suffering is redemptive – because passionate engagement in God’s mission transforms us and the world.

What do you see as one of your ministries as a Christ-follower? Where do your gifts, passions and life- circumstances intersect? (Try listing some of your gifts, your passions, and think through your circumstances: where do you live, what do you do, who do you live with, who do you live around? That's important data.)

Do you feel asked to sacrifice, “lay down,” any of your preferences or resources to make space for others? To alleviate suffering for other people? Have a conversation with Jesus about the answers you come up with.

Finding our way into God’s mission is a lifetime vocation.At different times in our lives we’re called to live out our mission in different ways. Where will you “carry the cross” today?

8-29-16 - Family Values

In our culture these days, the most benign-seeming things can become controversial, and nothing so much as family. The term “family values” is often associated with conservative Christian groups and their positions on social issues. More liberal elements in society redefine the term "family" beyond biological kin to include those we choose to love, be they same-gendered partners or adoptive children.

Jesus had something to say about family values too, but I don’t think our arguments about family would have interested him much. He told his followers to leave the whole concept behind and focus on making his Gospel of forgiveness and freedom known to the world.

Now large crowds were travelling with him; and he turned and said to them, ‘Whoever comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and even life itself, cannot be my disciple.

Did Jesus really say that? This was the man who, when told that his mother and brothers wanted to see him, mortified at the spectacle he was making, said, “Whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.” (Mt 12:50) This is the man whose followers left their homes and families to travel with him, checking in now and then, but committing themselves to a bigger, messier family.

Jesus’ teaching radically undermines how human nature and culture lead us to think and act. Our earthly families can be great blessings – and they are among the “things that are passing away.” In the perspective of eternity, they pale in importance to our membership in the family of God. We are invited to walk a fine line in loving and nurturing our human families and not letting our love for them distract us from cultivating our relationship of love with God.

That means prizing our family members as gifts from God given in trust to us to nurture and help grow, not to possess or cling to. We don’t have to love our families less – we are invited to love our mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, sisters and brothers in the household of God more. Then we are able to be even more loving to those in our human families.

Today, let’s give thanks for our families of origin –  the gifts, the challenges, the truth.
If your experience of family is painful, can you invite the living water of healing into those wounds?
Reflect on who you’ve come to know and love in your “God-family” –

   grandparents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins in the faith. 

Who comes to mind?  What has she or he brought to your life?
Who are your “children” in faith – people whom you’ve mentored and supported in their faith life?
Who do you know who could use a new family, whom you might bring into the household of God?

Families in the “developed world” are said to be shrinking. The family of God is ever growing, as we expand our circles of love and healing to include ever more brothers and sisters, nieces and nephews. That’s a lot of birthday cards!

8-26-16 - The "No Rewards" Card

“You’ll get your reward in heaven.” That’s a line I heard a lot growing up. But most of the marketing we encounter (and generate…) is geared toward letting us know the rewards we will get the moment we begin using the product. "Credit cards” are now often called “reward cards.”

I frequently encourage people to get involved in helping other people, usually those who fall into the category Jesus names in this story, “the poor, the crippled, the lame and the blind,” those who, due to circumstance of birth or disability, are not fully equipped to provide for themselves. I always stress the rewards – the satisfaction of using your gifts to make a difference, the expansion of personal experience, the chance to make new friends, the opportunity to participate in God’s mission of restoration and wholeness.

Jesus had no such gambits. He just said, “You’re not going to be rewarded in this life. You’ll see your pay-off way down the line. Do it anyway.”

"But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, and the blind. And you will be blessed, because they cannot repay you, for you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.”

I have a little quibble with this, because there is something disempowering about only receiving “services,” not having a chance to give back. But Jesus is not talking about works of charity. He is challenging us to forge relationships with people who have nothing to offer us in this world. And notice he doesn’t say anything about dropping off sandwiches – he’s talking about banquets to which we invite those who have nothing to offer us back.

Or do they have more to offer than we realize? Something changes when we stop seeing those who frighten or annoy us as “those people,” or view those who are in need or debilitated as “victims” or “needy,” and rather as people with assets and talents and gifts to offer. It becomes a lot easier to think about having “them” in “our” space. We enlarge our space to accommodate them. Our reading from Hebrews on Sunday reminds us, “Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by doing that some have entertained angels without knowing it.”

I once welcomed a big, "motorcycle mama," somewhat scary looking woman to church, and she ended up helping me cook a parish dinner, teaching me the way chefs chop onions. She joined that church, and later went to seminary. Angels.

The realm of God is one of radical social equality (maybe that’s why so many decline to dwell there). “In Christ there is neither Jew nor Greek, woman nor man, slave nor free,” Paul wrote into the future. Our superficial differences melt away as we become part of the family of God. And you do meet the most amazing people hanging out with this family.

This “no rewards” card has a surprising number of rewards to offer, right here and now.

8-25-16 - Guest Lists

Being in a new community, I’m already making mental lists of people I’d like to invite over, people I'd like get to know better, those who have already had me to dinner – and maybe some who I’d like to invite me back. I've been known to invite people I think are important, with whom I’d like to become friendly so I feel important. Wrong! says Jesus.

"When you give a luncheon or a dinner, do not invite your friends or your brothers or your relatives or rich neighbors, in case they may invite you in return, and you would be repaid. But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, and the blind.”

This teaching hits us where we live, literally. In this day and age, living as we do in fragmented and stratified communities, most people see their homes as places of safety and refuge. We might be willing to be challenged outside, and invite the marginalized into our church halls and community centers. But our homes?

Or is that exactly where we are to live out the Good News? Jesus was always crossing boundaries of difference to bring the Good News - as he did in coming to us in our time and space in the first place… As his followers we also are called to go beyond our zones of familiarity and comfort to reach out to the Other.

What kind of “Other” most scares or bothers you? (think age/ethnicity/profession/style…)
In prayer, can you imagine inviting one of those people into your home, to sit at your table? This is a way we can pray for and about people – in our imaginations.
What would you serve? Try to sit with this in your imagination, really feel what you would be feeling.
What might you say? What might your guest say? Who else might around that table?

Inviting strangers or people we find strange into our homes might be a stretch for most of us; it is for me. Perhaps we could start by inviting someone we consider “other” to breakfast or lunch in a restaurant – start with the encounter itself, deal with the discomfort of possibly disconnected conversation. If we remember that Jesus is also at that table with us, we might find it an adventure that opens up possibilities in us.

After all, the One who tells us to cross that boundary in the first place isn’t going to skip the party himself…

8-24-16 - Humility

It’s funny to think of humility as a virtue at which to excel – if we truly succeed, no one will know. “Mirror, mirror on the wall – who’s the humblest of them all?”

But that’s the upside-down-ness of the Life of God – it’s all backwards from the way we naturally think. Jesus said, “For all who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.” Humility is to be a characteristic of those who follow Christ. It’s worth spending a little time on. Let’s start with what it is not:

Humility is not humiliation, which is a kind of exposure of our worst attributes or actions. Enduring humiliation can sometimes lead us into true humility, but it’s a twisty, most undesirable road that can lead to despair and destructiveness instead.

Humility is not self-abasement or self-denigration. Talking about how awful and unworthy we are is, spiritually speaking, pride; pride being that tendency to think ourselves equal to God. When we run ourselves down, we are setting ourselves as judges of God’s work. That’s pride. Oh, we can judge our actions, and repent of destructive words, thoughts, behaviors – but to judge ourselves innately less worthy than another is as prideful as to say we are innately more worthy than another.

We might best define humility as the art of seeing ourselves clearly, seeing God clearly, and knowing who’s who. Humility includes rejoicing in our gifts and talents, in who we are as unique creatures made in God’s image. It includes enjoying being the best at what we do – and delighting in that as a gift from God, a gift enhanced by God’s life moving in us. (For a powerful reminder of this, watch this clip from the movie Chariots of Fire…)

Humility includes loving ourselves despite our shortcomings, which creates space for those shortcomings to be transformed. Humility helps us love other people better because we see them as neither more nor less important than we are. Humility helps us invite the love and grace of God into those parts of ourselves that are not as we wish, so that we become transformed from the inside.

What do you love most about yourself? What about yourself do you most wish to be transformed?

God is in the transformation business, and you have put yourself in God’s hands. Start giving thanks now for the beauty that shines through you – the beauty of perfect Love mixed with the beauty of Love’s unique creation that is you. Alleluia!

8-23-16 - Seating Order

It can be amusing at clergy gatherings watching people try to work their way toward the bishops, angling for seats next to them at meals. Access to the “important people” is often restricted. So imagine my bemusement when, in my first week in DC, I attended a conference and found myself sitting across from my new bishop at both lunch and dinner.

Jesus might have suggested I go to the other end of the table. He had a few things to say to those Pharisees who were observing his table manners so closely. In fact, he turned the tables on them: “If you’re invited to a wedding, go sit at the place furthest away from the action, where you feel the least honored. You might get upgraded, maybe to a table with the bride or groom’s family. But if you pick out that better seat, look out. You just might be asked to move.”

“For all who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”

Some people go through life expecting to be seated in the “lesser” seats – and they tend to be a lot happier than those of us who think we know what seats we merit. It can be a great spiritual practice, to walk into any event or party and just end up where and with whom we end up, not trying to plan or maneuver it. I often find it difficult though – sometimes, instead of a delightful surprise, I just find I’m sitting with people I find uninteresting. And that just means I didn’t take the spiritual practice far enough. What I should have done was to seek Christ in them.

It doesn’t really matter where we sit, or with whom, as long as Jesus is at the table. And he’s already sent us an open invitation. So anytime you don’t know where else you’re going to land, go to his house. Every seat is perfect.