8-29-16 - Family Values

In our culture these days, the most benign-seeming things can become controversial, and nothing so much as family. The term “family values” is often associated with conservative Christian groups and their positions on social issues. More liberal elements in society redefine the term "family" beyond biological kin to include those we choose to love, be they same-gendered partners or adoptive children.

Jesus had something to say about family values too, but I don’t think our arguments about family would have interested him much. He told his followers to leave the whole concept behind and focus on making his Gospel of forgiveness and freedom known to the world.

Now large crowds were travelling with him; and he turned and said to them, ‘Whoever comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and even life itself, cannot be my disciple.

Did Jesus really say that? This was the man who, when told that his mother and brothers wanted to see him, mortified at the spectacle he was making, said, “Whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.” (Mt 12:50) This is the man whose followers left their homes and families to travel with him, checking in now and then, but committing themselves to a bigger, messier family.

Jesus’ teaching radically undermines how human nature and culture lead us to think and act. Our earthly families can be great blessings – and they are among the “things that are passing away.” In the perspective of eternity, they pale in importance to our membership in the family of God. We are invited to walk a fine line in loving and nurturing our human families and not letting our love for them distract us from cultivating our relationship of love with God.

That means prizing our family members as gifts from God given in trust to us to nurture and help grow, not to possess or cling to. We don’t have to love our families less – we are invited to love our mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, sisters and brothers in the household of God more. Then we are able to be even more loving to those in our human families.

Today, let’s give thanks for our families of origin –  the gifts, the challenges, the truth.
If your experience of family is painful, can you invite the living water of healing into those wounds?
Reflect on who you’ve come to know and love in your “God-family” –

   grandparents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins in the faith. 

Who comes to mind?  What has she or he brought to your life?
Who are your “children” in faith – people whom you’ve mentored and supported in their faith life?
Who do you know who could use a new family, whom you might bring into the household of God?

Families in the “developed world” are said to be shrinking. The family of God is ever growing, as we expand our circles of love and healing to include ever more brothers and sisters, nieces and nephews. That’s a lot of birthday cards!