Of all the big "asks" that Jesus lays on his followers, perhaps the most extreme is this one: “But I say to you that listen, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. If anyone strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also; and from anyone who takes away your coat do not withhold even your shirt.”
It may be hard to see sometimes, but all humans have some innate capacity for generosity, compassion, collaboration. Jesus asks these attributes of us. But to love your enemy and do good to someone who hates you? That runs counter to human nature and most cultural norms. How can we structure societies and kinship groups if we have to love our enemies the same as we love our friends and relations?
Jesus held kinship relationships very lightly – witness his dismissiveness of his mother and brothers. In fact, he redefined family altogether, saying, “My mother and my brothers are those who hear the word of God and do it.” (Luke 8:21). And we can see what he thought of social and ethnic categories in his parable of the Good Samaritan, where the social outcast is the hero of the tale. But what about human nature? Are we not hard-wired to protect ourselves and those we love, as well as our possessions? How can we go around loving our enemies?
With only our human nature, I don’t believe we can. But we do not operate out of merely human nature. At our baptisms, God installs his operating system in us, and when we run on our God-nature, we access unimaginable power. Here’s how we can go about loving our enemies: Let God do it. Bring God into the triangle.
Like it or not, there is a line running between us and our enemies – we are bound to them by mutual hatred/fear/prejudice/anger/all of the above. It can be hard to pray along that axis, let alone open ourselves to communication or blessing. So I direct my prayers for those persons to God, and ask God to bless, forgive, heal and restore them. It is a powerful thing to ask God to bless someone you are unable to bless. We can’t know the effect it will have on the other person (though surprisingly often we see changes in behavior…), but it releases something in us and changes us.
As we begin to be freed of our own fear and hatred, we become better able to imagine doing good to those who hate us. There is self-interest as well as altruism in ensuring that those who hate us have enough to eat, safe places to sleep and solid education. If we are victims of abuse from someone else, sometimes the only power we hold is to pray for the abuser, as we are able to do so. There is no downside to praying that a vile and evil human being be blessed and healed and restored to his or her full humanity. Such conversion can only help us and protect other victims. Think of John Newton, the slave-trader who came to see the evil he perpetuated, and wrote of his conviction and conversion in the hymn Amazing grace!
In these days of national divisions deeper than most of us have known, it’s not hard to imagine people who hate us, or even people we’d consider enemies. So we have no shortage of opportunities to practice Jesus’ biggest ask.
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