“Mirror, mirror on the wall – who’s the humblest of them all?” It’s funny to think of humility as a virtue at which to excel – if we truly succeed, no one will know.
But that’s the upside-down-ness of the Life of God – it’s all backwards from the way we naturally think. “For all who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted,” Jesus says. So, does that mean as soon as someone has noticed your humility and pointed it out, you go back to square one?
Humility is to be a characteristic of those who follow Christ. It’s worth spending a little time on. Let’s start with what it is not:
Humility is not humiliation, which is a kind of exposure of our worst attributes or actions. Enduring humiliation can sometimes lead us into true humility, but it’s a twisty, most undesirable road that can lead to despair and destructiveness instead.
Humility is not self-abasement or self-denigration. Talking about how awful and unworthy we are is, spiritually speaking, pride; pride being that tendency to think ourselves equal to God. When we run ourselves down, we are setting ourselves as judges of God’s work. That’s pride. Oh, we can judge our actions, and repent of destructive words, thoughts, behaviors – but to judge ourselves innately less worthy than another is as prideful as to say we are innately more worthy than another.
We might best define humility as the art of seeing ourselves clearly, seeing God clearly, and knowing who’s who. Humility includes rejoicing in our gifts and talents, in who we are as unique creatures made in God’s image. It includes enjoying being the best at what we do – and delighting in that as a gift from God, a gift enhanced by God’s life moving in us. (For a powerful reminder of this, watch the first 1.44 minutes of this clip from the movie Chariots of Fire…)
Humility includes loving ourselves despite our shortcomings, which creates space for those shortcomings to be transformed. Humility helps us love other people better because we see them as neither more nor less important than we are. Humility helps us invite the love and grace of God into those parts of ourselves that are not as we wish, so that we become transformed from the inside.
Yesterday, I invited you to make a list of things about yourself that you’re not thrilled with, and another list of things you are proud of. Go back to the first list, and invite the Holy Spirit into each one of those things, asking for a glimpse of what it might look like transformed. (Temper into a passion for justice? Sadness into a greater capacity for compassion? Over-shopping into more proactive generosity?)
For the second list, remind yourself of how each of those attributes makes the portrait of you more true. Give God the credit.
And those of us who have had a habit of self-abasement can ask God’s forgiveness and help in seeing ourselves more clearly. “Mirror, mirror on the wall – show me true, not too big or small.”
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